A long time ago, don't know when and don't know
where, because there wasn't any where and there wasn't any time. But, a long time ago
there was nothing and it was no where that makes sense. Nothing can be no where. Nothing
doesn't have to have somewhere to be, because it is nothing, and nothing can be no where.
A long time ago there was nothing no where, a long time ago when there wasn't anywhere.
And one day this nothing all
got together and decided to be something. Now something can't be nowhere, so nowhere is
now somewhere, because you see it has to have somewhere to be something. Because nothing
can be nowhere, but something can't be nowhere, it has to be somewhere. So now nowhere is
somewhere and now nothing is something and this is a long time ago when there wasn't
And now this nothing that has
become something is somewhere a long time ago when there wasn't anywhere and it got to
going round and round real fast and a chunk of something flew off of something which was
formally nothing and is now something and when it cooled, it is the earth you live on and
that's really something. And they don't know where the sunshine came from but you can't
live without it so that's handy and they don't know where the water came from, but you've
got to have it and you can't live without it so that's handy.
And so there was water and
sunshine and wind and the wind blew and the sun shone and the water rippled and the wind
blew and the sun shone and the water rippled and the wind blew and the sun shone and the
water rippled and that went on and on and nobody knows how long cause there was nobody
And then one day a glob of
jelly (protoplasm - amoeba) came floating up out of the water and it landed on the shore.
Now most jelly would have gone right back in the next wave but not this one, it was a real
sticker and it stuck right there for over four million years. For four million years doing
nothing one day it began to wiggle, I don't blame it after four million years, I'd do
something too. Now it began to wiggle and squiggle and giggle and then it came alive and
then it died and the sands of time buried it, and it came alive and then it died and the
sands of time buried it and it came alive and it died and it lived and it died and it
lived and now you're not going to believe just what I'm going to tell you, but now, he
teaches over there at the university. Don't get mad at me, I didn't say it. Evolution said
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